Oh My Darn It!

In my opinion there just isn't a societal label that is "good" enough to describe Jackson. He is not the result of a vaccine, an accident, an illness or injury. He was fearfully, wonderfully, PERFECTLY made by the master creator. God always knew. He knew when he created me and he knew when he created Todd and he knew when he brought us together and made us parents. We don't ask "why us"...God's omniscience and provisions for our lives and hearts are enough. There is a lot of peace in that. Do I ache when Jackson struggles, absolutely. Do I get a little embarrassed when I have to carry a flailing, cursing eight year old away from a very busy swimming pool, sure I do. Do I LOVE that I get to cling to the Lord when I've had more than I think I can handle and he draws me in, refills me, comforts me and sends me back on my way...without a doubt.

God ALWAYS gives us exactly what we need. Peace, strong arms, a sturdy heart, a loving...forgiving spouse, a sense of humor, good birthing hips (thank you Jesus), a life blessed with Jacksonisms like "Oh my darn it!"...He knew, He always knew.


Psalm 139:13-17

13 For you created my inmost being;
you knit me together in my mother's womb.

14 I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made;
your works are wonderful,
I know that full well.

15 My frame was not hidden from you
when I was made in the secret place.
When I was woven together in the depths of the earth,

16 your eyes saw my unformed body.
All the days ordained for me
were written in your book
before one of them came to be.

17 How precious to me are your thoughts, O God!
How vast is the sum of them!



Psalm 59:16

16 But I will sing of your strength,
in the morning I will sing of your love;
for you are my fortress,
my refuge in times of trouble.









GOD CHOOSES A MOM FOR A DISABLED CHILD
by Erma Bombeck

Most women become mothers by accident, some by choice, a few by social pressures, and a couple by habit. This year, nearly 100,000 women will become mothers of handicapped children. Did you ever wonder how mothers of handicapped children are chosen? Somehow I visualize God hovering over Earth selecting his instruments for propagation with great care and deliberation. As he observes, he instructs his angels to make notes in a giant ledger.

"Armstrong, Beth; son; patron saint, Matthew.

"Forrest, Marjorie; daughter; patron saint, Cecelia.

"Rudledge, Carrie; twins; patron saint.... give her Gerard. He's used to profanity."

Finally, he passes a name to an angel and smiles, "Give her a handicapped child."

The angel is curious. "Why this one, God? She's so happy."

"Exactly," smiles God. "Could I give a handicapped child a mother who does not know laughter? That would be cruel."

"But has she patience?" asks the angel.

"I don't want her to have too much patience or she will drown in a sea of self-pity and despair. Once the shock and resentment wears off, she'll handle it. I watched her today. She has that feeling of self and Independence. She'll have to teach the child to live in her world and that's not going to be easy."

"But, Lord, I don't think she even believes in you."

God smiles. "No matter. I can fix that. This one is perfect. She has just enough selfishness."

The angel gasps, "Selfishness? Is that a virtue?"

God nods. "If she can't separate herself from the child occasionally, she'll never survive. Yes, there is a woman I will bless with a child less then perfect. She doesn't realize it yet, but she is to be envied. She will never take for granted a 'spoken word.' She will never consider a 'step' ordinary. When her child says 'Momma' for the first time, she will be present at a miracle and know it! When she describes a tree or a sunset to her blind child, she will see it as few people ever see my creations.

"I will permit her to see clearly the things I see --- ignorance, cruelty, prejudice --- and allow her to rise above them. She will never be alone. I will be at her side every minute of every day of her life because she is doing my work as surely as she is here by my side."

"And what about her patron saint?" asks the angel, his pen poised in midair.

God smiles. "A mirror will suffice."

A saint I'm not but a blessed mommy to five beautiful, unique, precious children...now, that's me!!!